So, I've come to the conclusion that i hate not having a best freind anymore. Miller is the closest thing i have to it. But she's with andy and we all know how andy is with his girlfriends so pretty much i can't even see her often. I really wanna start hanging out with people that i could hang out with all the time. Friends mean so much to me and i relized today that i don't honestly have a group of close freinds. I just adore how people can be so close to x amout of people and you know there always with them. I was going through my phone book and i was like "wow, this kinda sucks. i dont have that. I wish i did though". I hate this sorta thing.

Enough of My self-pitty it gets kinda pathetic.

Everyone's going to Steff's tonight and i feel left out cause no one invited me and i hate asking if i can come over Because then i just feel like a burden but i  really wanna go over there cause i love those girls. I wish i was closer to them, but i know i won't be unless they want me to cause i won't invite myself, i hate doing that.

On a lighter note:

Next weekend my dad is taking me to paola, KS to see travis,cam,greg,fluke,casey etc. I am super excited about this cause i miss them. And travis, yeah no explanation there. It's awesome. I think ill just hang with them all next weekend. Cause the everyone's going to hatebreed or doing something else. But i don't care, i love kansas kids. I really want to move there.

Would someone please call me, i wanna go hang out. I don't care what we do. But i really need to start hanging out with an exclusive group. Non of this person to person crap.

<3

I want no scratch that,<S>want</S> i need to see travis. I need to know if he feels like i do. I need to go to kansas.

I just finished it. I hope you like it.Took me a month.

Comment please<3

//All this rejection's got me so low
If he keeps it up I just might tell him no
When he's saying that he wants only me
Then I wonder why he sleeps with my friends\\

Friday night

Went to the dollar movie with my mom and grandma. And the weirdest thing happen'd. I was texting Daniel when we both figured out we were at the same movie theater at the same time.So i told him  to meet me in the lobby. On my way there here comes jirka,toby,suzanne,and jeff. It was cute. Everyone was there. And then we all went to our movies.

Saturday-

Woke up at 7:30 went to saturday school and then my mom picked me up and we went shopping.Then she had to get ready for this company party. So my dad came and got me and me and him went and saw resident evil 2 at this really ghetto dollar movie theater.That was a really good movie. I didn't know killswitch was in there either. Went back to my dad's and fell asleep on the couch the second after i hung up the phone with fluke(yeah yeah fluke i said i wasn't tired but i was , no one likes a smartass.ha)

Today's sunday and im craving some mcdonalds.

Still got that petty crush.It's kinda faggish.

Leave me some Lovin'

P.S. me and daniel's dogs are true thugs.

My newest art peice is done. Pictures up hopefully tomorrow.

Fucking Kansas. I wish i could just blow it up. Or live there.

Travis breaks my heart.He says' he likes me and thinks about me constantly and talks to me constantly and i hate him because i can't have him. He lives in missouri and has a girlfreind but fuck that.

I think, I think too much.

And i think..i've started to like Fluke which isn't good.

Cat in the Hat is seriously the best movie ever.

I need to hurry up and be 18.

Stolen from Kristin

10 Random Things About Me:

1. Im never certain of anything

2. I Like to many people from outta state.

3. I let myself fall hard even though I always told myself not to

4. I pronounce Atlanta "Antlanta"

5. I have way too much time to myself

6. I get jealous easily

7. I Hate being single in the winter

8. Scratch that. I hate being single period.

9.I get a little stuck in the future sometimes

10. I Sleep with my phone on incase someone calls me at 3am.

9 Places I've Visited:

1. Ohio

2. Vegas

3. Paola,KS

4. Antlanta,Ga

5. Dallas,TX

6. Kawaii

7. Jamica

8. Virgin Islands

9. Missouri

8 Things I Want To Do Before I Die:

1. move out of state

2. get a tattoo

3. Move to Kansas

4. See The gravestone of a Misfit

5. Have sex on a pool table( im not kidding)

6. fallinlove

7. be somewhat successful/not make my parents even more disappointed

8. Go on tour with a band for 6 months.

7 Ways To Win My Heart:

1. make me laugh

2. not being a doucheass

3. make the first move

4. flirting

5. cuddling like crazy

6. lying happens but make a fucking effort for me not to find out

7. Holds my hand like WHOA.

6 Things I Believe In:

1. sorry

2. but

3. this

4. is

5. fucking

6. retarded

5 Things I'm Afraid Of:

1. Being alone.

2. Losing friends.

3. Not doing something with my life

4. being fat

5. Black ghetto people

4 Of My Favorite Items In My Room:

1. Photos on the wall,paintings and artwork i've done.

2. my bed

3. computer

4. stereo

3 Things I Do Everyday:

1. go to school

2. bitch

3. spend way too much "me" time

2 Things I'm Trying Not To Do Right Now:

1. thinking about kansas and my petty crushes

2. be cold

1 Person I Want To Hug:

1. My kansas boys.

I love how me and Fluke can talk about Anything. We were just sitting here arguing about red heads and how it's not always true that there firecrotches. Seriously dude. It's not always true.

So i decided to get a livejournal cause it's just cooler. You don't have to have premium to do all the cool shit. And it's cooler over here anyway.

I hate the word "Hott". It's just stupid like seriously i rather be called "beautiful" or "pretty" or "cute". "Hott" just sounds so lame. Like something a 40 year old man at a bar would say to a 19 year old. I just don't get it. I think "cute" is the best term for me.

I really miss hanging out with Kate George and Kristin and them. I really like how down to earth they are. Seriously i think that Danielle,kate,kristin,steff, and krissy are really awesome girls.

I miss travis,fluke,kyle,pat, daniel, and casey(even though he's a bitch). Fluke and i are becoming close and i love it.

So who wants to blow up kansas with me?! i know kristin does.

so my dreams have come true. I'm gonna be a merch girl next summer for my freinds band when they go on tour.

iFASHIONVICTIMx: one sec. i really have to piss.
PaternsInIvy: go find megan
PaternsInIvy: comeon i know you want to piss on someone
iFASHIONVICTIMx: haha not really.
iFASHIONVICTIMx: my aim  is pretty bad